The 30 Days of Truth writing prompts have been great so far. Are you playing along? You totally should! Some great posts have been written here and here, too.
Here is my Day 1 and Day 2.
Day 3: Something you have to forgive yourself for.
I am a pretty forgiving person. I forgive other people easily, especially if they apologize for something they've done to me, as long as they are sincere. I don't have the time or the energy to hold major grudges, and there are very few people... actually... there is no one I really hate. No one has crushed me that badly yet, and although I've had my heart broken before, it was nothing that I wasn't able to get over.
As for myself, what can I forgive?
I forgive myself for not being a perfect mom.
Growing up, every single night, my family and I would sit around the dinner table, enjoying a home cooked meal. Dinner time was important, and we never missed an opportunity to sit together, eating the food my mother had cooked. Each day was something different, something traditional, something healthy.
Since I'm a full-time working mom, I'm not able to do this for my children. I pick up my children from either my parent's house or my in-law's house at 5 o'clock everyday, and they'll just be sitting down to eat. I join them, usually. And it makes me sad that from Monday to Friday, we don't really have a 'regular' dinner routine at our house.
I'm thankful that they're able to eat so well during the week. It's just sad that they'll never say: "Mom was the best cook!" Rather, they'll say: "Yiayia's cooking was the best!" On the weekends, usually my husband cooks, as I can be quite... dangerous in the kitchen. However, I try. Once a week, I put dinner on the table for my kids, and that's something.
I forgive myself for not providing what I always thought I would for my children, a home cooked meal every night of the week. I'm sure if I was a stay-at-home-mom, I would cook more often. Maybe in a few years, I'll be able to do that? For now, my boys are happy and well-fed, and I get to enjoy other things with them during the week, like our morning routines, bath time, reading, and bed time.
I'm sure they'll remember that as much as who put the food on the table, right?