Sunday, July 31, 2011

Stress, hello.

It's just after midnight and here I sit, working, er, typing away, on my computer. But since typing on my computer, or rather, laptop, technically is working, here I sit, working, trying to tie up a dozen or so loose ends before I leave for BlogHer in a few days.

I am not writing a post about BlogHer, since I've already done that, and since you've all seriously read enough BlogHer posts these last few weeks, it's almost making you NOT want to go, because can't we all shut-up about BlogHer already? In related news, I almost had a heart attack reading Marinka's latest post, in which she made me think she was quitting blogging with her cleverly titled post, Good-bye. Could be that I'm just really tired, too.

I seriously haven't been talking about BlogHer too much, I swear. The fact that I am willingly leaving my husband and children for three nights and four days is not keeping me up at night or causing me to have a severe case of anxiety, making my road rage a little more ragier (if that's not a word, it totally should be) than usual. No, not at all.

Okay, I'm lying. As my mother would say, WHAT KIND OF MOTHER LEAVES HER CHILDREN FOR THREE DAYS? Oh my goodness. ONLY THE WORST KIND OF MOTHER! ME! Sob.

Okay, okay, I know I'm not a bad mom, but still. The worry! The guilt! The panic attacks! I'm hardly able to focus on anything more than: "What will I pack? What will I wear? How many dresses do I need? Is one suitcase enough? It almost wasn't, last year... do I need more shoes? Will the boys have enough clean underwear? Will they forget about me? Remember to pack their snow globes in the suitcase, not carry-on, in case I have to deal with stupid people at customs. Dear God, don't let me forget my Ativan. Will I have to talk to Mario Lopez about my period? Ew."

I guess I'm a little stressed about leaving for so long. Yes, I consider 3 nights away from my children a long time to be away. I know they're not babies and I know they'll be in excellent hands with their father, but still... I'm a mom. And I worry. And damn it, it's more than a one hour plane ride, so maybe I should drink something um, with alcohol in it, to wash down my Ativan?

Right. Time to go to bed now, where I will stay awake for another hour or so trying to forget that to-do list of mine that is somehow not shrinking.

I think I need a vacation. Somewhere warm, with a lot of nice people, by the ocean. Like maybe California?

8 comments:

Kat (@bumpandhustle) said...

Awww I have totally been there. But trust me. 3 days is not that bad. You recharge, you breathe, you feel infused with new 'super-mom-and-wife' energy.
You can call them. You will probably have a moment when you are looking at pictures of them and trying not to sob. But most importantly, Mummy, you have to do this amazing thing! This is for you. And when you give to yourself, you give to your family.
Also, if you're worried about packing, just pack one outfit for each day you're there..and shop for the rest! Have a blast:) xo

Kate Coveny Hood said...

Oh I know how you feel... I hate the idea of leaving my kids for so long. They're not exactly the easiest children...and sometimes I'm the only one who knows how to handle them. But then I remind myself that they were fine last year. And they're older this year. And they're so much better with their Dad than they used to be... What - have I been thinking about this a little? Ha! See you in a few days!

Scary Mommy said...

I hear you!!! But, they'll be fine and it will be a BLAST!

Marinka said...

This happens to all of us before every conference. And we're so grateful for the time away, even though we miss them.

Have the best time! I'm counting on you.

Karl said...

Everybody will be fine. Plus, you'll be bringing home tons of swag to give the kids, so they'll love it.

JackiYo said...

Enjoy! So wish I was heading there with you. sigh.

Avitable said...

Your kids won't even remember who you are - they'll be fine! And the plane probably won't crash, and if you need to, you can just wear sweatpants to the conference!

:)

Elaine A. said...

You got your drink tickets, right?

Good. ;-P

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