Dear Rainbow Brite,
As a child, I loved you. I played with you to no end. You were a part of my innocent childhood, a childhood where body image and big boobs and a tiny waist meant nothing to me.
You were super cute. You had a lot of super cute friends. I especially loved your good friend, Canary Yellow. I remember getting Canary Yellow at my 9th birthday party from a friend, and I was really happy. I also happened to be wearing a yellow dress at the time... coincidence? Hmm... anyway, I have a bone to pick with you, Rainbow.
What. Have. You. Done. To. Yourself?
You went out and pulled a Heidi? I mean, come on! You looked good before... and now, you look... all grown-up. Was this really necessary? I don't think so! Your dress is more revealing now - low-cut, and shorter - to show more leg. Your arms are exposed. You're wearing too much make-up, and are those hair extensions I see?
Sigh, Rainbow Brite. If this was not bad enough, you're now 'best friends' with Moon Glow and Tickled Pink? What? What happened to your core BFF's? Like Lala Orange? And Canary Yellow?
I don't know, Rainbow. You're not the girl I once knew.
Oh, and while we're at it, can you please pass along this message to Strawberry Shortcake, too? Strawberry - your nose job is SO obvious, and your hair extensions look fake!
I tell ya... it's a good thing I'm a mom to boys only!
P.S. I need to know - did you ever hook up with Red Butler? Or was Buddy Blue the guy for you?
This post was written as part of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.