Thursday, February 4, 2010

Dear Rainbow Brite...

Dear Rainbow Brite,

As a child, I loved you. I played with you to no end. You were a part of my innocent childhood, a childhood where body image and big boobs and a tiny waist meant nothing to me.

You were super cute. You had a lot of super cute friends. I especially loved your good friend, Canary Yellow. I remember getting Canary Yellow at my 9th birthday party from a friend, and I was really happy. I also happened to be wearing a yellow dress at the time... coincidence? Hmm... anyway, I have a bone to pick with you, Rainbow.

What. Have. You. Done. To. Yourself?



You went out and pulled a Heidi? I mean, come on! You looked good before... and now, you look... all grown-up. Was this really necessary? I don't think so! Your dress is more revealing now - low-cut, and shorter - to show more leg. Your arms are exposed. You're wearing too much make-up, and are those hair extensions I see?

Sigh, Rainbow Brite. If this was not bad enough, you're now 'best friends' with Moon Glow and Tickled Pink? What? What happened to your core BFF's? Like Lala Orange? And Canary Yellow?





I don't know, Rainbow. You're not the girl I once knew.

Oh, and while we're at it, can you please pass along this message to Strawberry Shortcake, too? Strawberry - your nose job is SO obvious, and your hair extensions look fake!



I tell ya... it's a good thing I'm a mom to boys only!

P.S. I need to know - did you ever hook up with Red Butler? Or was Buddy Blue the guy for you?

This post was written as part of Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop.

38 comments:

skichik79 said...

Dora has one too !! I am with you Lou ...

FalkFamily said...

Ohmygosh! Nothing excited me more to hear that Rainbow Brite was coming back. I was going to get them for my daughter. I am sorely disappointed :(

Everydaymoms said...

I agree! If they were going to bring back these popular characters that we knew as kids, they should have left them be. They were beautiful and perfect they way they were. Now, our little girls will never know the characters we grew up with.
I know it's 2010 and things are different, but for goodness sake, these are little girls we're talking about. They will be the ones watching these shows.

Okay...I think I'm done. =)

Suzanne said...

Awesome post, Lou! I hadn't realized that Rainbow Brite had been "made over"; I am SO disappointed. Why? Why do they have to bring back our beloved '80s toys, and why do they have to revamp them?! Leave them be, I say! In the '80s!!!!

T Rex Mom said...

Wow! I often wondered about these characters and look at them now - I do wonder what happened. I used to LOVE Strawberry Shortcake - now, not so much.

Shana said...

Had not seen this yet. How sad that society thinks this is what little girls should aspire to be. Disappointed.

Chantal said...

LOL yes it also makes me glad I only have boys :)

becca said...

OMG... I loved this. Hysterical and so true! I bet Cabbage Patch kids would come back all sassy and trashy too wouldn't they?
loved this!

Krystyn said...

I'm so with you. I got an email to review the new rainbow brite and I was like what the heck did they do to her?

Michele Horne said...

Well, you must feel deeply for me since I have THREE girls. And I have to deal with this stuff every day. I just don't know what these marketing people are thinking.

Rebecca said...

ack!! awful, just awful. I had a Rainbow Brite bed set, dress, dolls...but this? what are they wearing?!

I have a little girl! luckily, while she loves Dora, she also is into hot wheels and dinosaurs ;)

Elaine A. said...

I actually think the Shortcake chick looks better. She was kinda "dorky" before... ;)

2 Little Irish Boys said...

Some things were just so much better when we were little-TV included!!

Lady Mama said...

I had totally forgotten about Rainbow Bright! What a disappointment. And people wonder why girls grow up with body image issues? Tsk.

CaraBee said...

Amen. What's with the grown-up-ification of all of these kiddie icons? I heard that Dora was getting a makeovert, too. Why can't kids' cartoons just be kids?

Annette said...

Yuck. I agree with you!

Thought the S. Shortcake on Saturday mornings was close to normal.

Angepeets said...

Hilarious! I actually found it emotionally hard to compare the 2 images...it's so disappointing!

Loukia said...

Elaine - you know, you have a point, Strawberry Shortcake isn't THAT bad... especially in comparison to Rainbow Brite!

Mercy said...

Why they have to go and make these children's characters all grown up I'll never know. They seem somehow robbed of their childish innocence.

hoobingfamilyadventures.com said...

What is it with skinnier and sluttier versions of kids toys?! What are the marketers thinking?

Jessica said...

Holy crap!! I had no idea they'd changed them so much! Why must a little kid's doll be pre-teened like that? We already have curvy, made-up, busty Barbie!!

Theta Mom said...

OMG - And have you seen Holly Hobby???

Michelle said...

Glad I'm not the only one. I found my Strawberry Shortcake doll and gave it to my daughter. I then thought I'd go online to see the 'new or improved' look and couldn't believe my eyes!

anya said...

That's just wrong.

Sarah said...

Geez. I had heard about this, but hadn't seen the pictures. Terrible!

Brittany at Mommy Words said...

*Sigh* Sophia is 3 and thinks the new Rainbor Brite and Strawberry Shortcake are more beautiful. I disagreed. She told me I was allowed to like the old ones because I am older.

*Sigh and Growl*

Margaret aka: Fact Woman said...

I love the old rainbow bright but the new one is so trashy. Why couldn't they left perfection alone!! Thanks for saying what we all were thinking!
I really am looking forward to reading more of your blog. I'll be following along now.

Elisa @ Globetrotting in Heels said...

OMG, they have given Rainbow Brite a make-ho-ver. My life no longer has any meaning. Goodbye cruel world.

Alyssa said...

LOL. I love this post...you smug mother of boys...Having a daughter the Bratz dolls are the ones most disconcerting to me, and not permitted in our house. And how about the nursing doll??? Too much. Too much.

Jen said...

now that is makeover and not a good one.

The Beckster said...

Where did you find those pics? Soo cute!!

Lainey-Paney said...

...just think: Hermione Granger from Harry Potter....she's growing up.

Drew Barrymore from E.T. & then those Poison Ivy movies...

They all grow up....

But cartoons!? They don't have to!

Sara @ Domestically Challenged said...

I agree with you. leave her alone! Unsex her!!

Shawna Nicholson said...

Great post Loulou. this is my first (and not last) time to read your blog. I agree with the Rainbow Brite not looking the same, and I too am super thankful to be a boyMOM and not ever having to worry about my lil girl dressing in thong-showing short skirts with their cleavage hanging out! But on a positive note...Strawberry Shortcake dolls still smell the EXACT same! I bribed my boys to go down a "girly pink" aisle recently and was super excited to find Ms. Shortcake and her friends...they looked different...but smelled the same. :) Super cute boys and thanks for visiting my blog! :) IT's so nice to find and read about other mother's of boys out there!

designHER Momma said...

you are hilarious! Hey - and what ever happened to the Smurfs? Have they resurfaced?

Smart A$$ Mom said...

That whore did WHAT?!?! I can't believe it!

Muthering Heights said...

Yikes!!! She looks a little too mature these days!

Shannon @ AnchorMommy said...

Gah! I had no idea! I was a bigger Strawberry Shortcake fan than Rainbow Brite, so I am heartbroken by what Strawberry has done to herself. That is not right!

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